494: What it Takes to Change - 30 Days of Blogging - Day 28

An interesting point came up this evening while at work. It was a very busy night, and I was there later than usual, so I would be getting home much later than usual. I still had my blog for today due, and while I took a moment and realized the time, and the blog still needed to be written, I had the back chat come up of, "you could always skip it and start over."

There was a bit of energy attached to it, because I 'trusted' it in a way - like I, for that moment it came up, allowed myself to actually consider it. - I entertained the idea The next moment however I knew I would not give in, I would write the blog, and stick to this commitment, so I stopped my participation in that idea.

What is interesting is that even 28 days into this process of creating a new habit of daily blogging, there is still a part of me, as revealed in the back chat. that wants to give excuses as to why I don't follow through. This has been a situation I've allowed many times... I work evenings and often when I get home from work, it's pretty much relax, maybe an episode of some show, and then sleep. I've had moments of considering writing blogs or doing work after I get off work, but through time I've proven to myself that I never do. It's pretty much the same routine for me after work.

So it was cool to see this point come up, amidst the 30 days of blogging, even so close to the end of the stretch, and to see that decision to walk the commitment to myself and to blogging must still be made. That even though I've proven to myself for the past 28 days that I will decide to do it, to support in creating this new habit, I'm still tested to see where I'm standing - if I've actually created this habit as part of who I am.

I've noticed this is often the case when it comes to self-change. When we are creating a new habit or stopping an old one... sometimes they are so ingrained as who we are we have to over, and over, and over again keep making the same decision to change. One time doesn't always cut it. And sometimes the second or third time having to continue making that decision to change tests our limits, and stand, and sometimes we think 'it's not working' or 'it's too hard' because of these thoughts and back chats we have, and excuses and justifications we give ourselves to give in.

This was something I wrote about some blogs ago... that you have to keep making that decision to change, despite the experience to give up, to actually create the change. It was interesting to see it again... I have not yet transcended this point, the habit is not absolutely part of myself because there still exists within me a back door, an attempt to excuse myself from the commitment and action of daily blogging.

This process tests us in so many ways so that we can prove to ourselves that we are standing within principles. And if we are not standing, we will see, we will fall, and give up, and have to start over. Though through time, we stand, get tested, continue to stand, and only strengthen our resolve to be self-directive.

So I'm still in process, and not giving up. I committed myself to walk 30 days of blogging, and I commit myself to see that through. And I commit myself to walk past those 30 days to prove to myself that I'm not limited to even 30 day. I will leave you with an awesome quote from an amazing example that sums this blog up well. (image below)

Enjoy your Process.






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