536: The WHOLE Picture, not just the Nice One

Continuing from yesterday's blog... the point of creating inconsistent blogging through inconsistent self-support, and the following is forgiving that relationship.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide from myself when I go through more emotional, tough points in my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define tough within a negative energy charge and so when I define something as tough - I resist it, and give in immediately as not being able to put in the good fight for myself to stand and remain stable, and direct myself through that tough point

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear exposing difficult points I face within my day to day living with others, as not wanting others to see me as weak

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe I should not share the struggles I walk through in my day to day living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to only present a better image of myself wherein I am directive, and stable, and to thus resist sharing the more real, raw experiences that is part of walking my process through the mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall within the experience of becoming emotional, or facing more difficult points within my life, as not willing to support myself through with the tools essential to my transcendence and ability to let go, and emerge as directive principle and to within this not share with others the struggle, and the process, and the example that it IS possible to get through ALL of life's challenges, as often times, it is made to be more challenging by our own minds

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand the very point of this process is to walk through those difficult times, within/as the tools that are here to support, and to show others the way in supporting them to support themselves

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create inconsistencies within my blogging as not wanting to be open, and honest, and real with myself, or others, about what I face - the good, the bad, and the ugly

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as weak, and thus not want others to see this as well

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to inferiorize myself in relation to more challenging points within my life as the process I walk, in not willing myself to share, and remain open and honest about what I'm going through, and using the tools I have to support myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my struggles as bad/negative, and so define myself as bad/negative and want to hide these aspects of myself from myself, and from others

I forgive myself that I have not yet allowed myself to share unconditionally, with myself and so with others, who I am and the process I walk as not putting up a fake face, but keeping it REAL within what this process through the mind is all about

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe I can only share when I'm absolutely stable, or when I'm not facing/walking through any difficult points, to present an image of myself that others will define me as 'good/positive' - in fear of others seeing the real story

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to be the work in progress that I am, as this process I walk, and to share ALL of that unconditionally, and not just the points that make me look good and others can admire

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto self-judgments, and definitions that I believe I must present which prevent me from being real with myself and others in a consistent way, such as through blogging

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create my blogging to be conditional wherein I will only share that which makes me look good

When and as I see myself resisting sharing my blogs due to some difficult points I face, and so creating inconsistency within my blogging, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that already this is red flag for how I am, or not supporting myself throughout my day as I see, realize, and understand that if I were supporting myself within the tools I have to support myself with, blogging would not be a struggle - adding to the already existent struggle. I commit myself to thus see blogging as an extension of who I am already within the tools of self-support, and to when I'm resisting blogging - use that as a point of support to see where else I am not supporting myself, and to move myself to get to it - to do that which is necessary to be done for me to face, walk through, and transcend whatever it is I am facing

When and as I see myself wanting to present only the nicer image of me when I am stable, and directive, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that this is still within the ego of my mind as self-interest and thus putting up a fake face, and not being real with myself, which is exactly what to remove from myself as this process of re-birth and so I commit myself to stop presenting the nicer image, and instead present the WHOLE image, as making myself whole again through being real about what I go through, and what I face, and who I've created myself to be as the mind, and how I am able, and do direct myself to change

When and as I see myself judging the more difficult points I walk through in my process, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that in judging, I am separating myself from that which is existent within me, and created by me and so I commit myself to stop self-judgments, and acts of separation as seeing myself as inferior to what which I face in my process, and rather EMBRACE it as getting to know me, and how I can change me as that which is the only way to actually change - through understanding and forgiveness






Featured Artwork: Desteni Artists

The Journey to Lifers


Take Responsibility for what is HERE as this world, within AND without:

Desteni

DIP Lite Course (FREE)


DIP Pro


Eqafe (Self Perfecting interviews, books, music, etc)


For your Info:


Destonian Wiki



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

533: When Behaviors and Patterns start to Flare Up

Day 190: Raising my Voice and Running Away - The Truth Revealed

697: My Final Entry